Megan Fox and mothers pancine: chronicle of an announced disaster

You don’t need to be a mother to know that, in a world where every single tiny action of one is judged by the other in no uncertain terms (and sometimes even posted on social networks), among the most uncompromising categories of people there are them: the little bellies. Those for which life revolves only around children, and woe to say that there is also professional ambition, another man, a dinner with friends (every now and then); those for which the children are all beautiful, but their two-year-old already reads, speaks English, and even shares games; those for which if you do not post your child’s photos on social networks, it is because, after all, you want to get rid of them a little; the ones that a mother is a mother for, for God’s sake, don’t you want to wear those slut clothes?

And then there’s Megan Fox. The former sex bomb of Transformersas well as Machine Gun Kelly’s current girlfriend, as well as the mom-of-three (read: Journey River, Bodhi Ransom, Noah Shannon) who, of all this mommy tummy stuff, is obvious: he doesn’t even want to hear about it.

Yet, until the marriage to ex-husband Brian Austin Green (see under: Beverly Hills 90210) was booming, Megan Fox seemed to be sailing straight on that all Montessori route and strictly alcohol-free birthday parties. A sea where the photographic reportage of a trip to Disneyland for the whole family, headbands with Mickey ears and encounters with Pocahontas and Buzz Lightyear is not the dream of every millennial who has become a parent; rather, what a little tummy, dominated by the wishes of the offspring, sooner or later imposes itself. And that in the case of Fox, three years after that October 2019, she sees in the ring of Instagram the low blows of the opponents: “Spend more time with your children and not behind this midlife crisis”; «The last photo of her while she is WIFE and MOTHER. Wow »; «You have created three beautiful children! The real fulfillment for a woman is motherhood! I’m praying for you to come back to the light! Jesus loves you and will always love you! ». If it were a comic, the onomatopoeias of kicks and punches would be wasted; And Patapum!Megan goes down.

Or maybe not? Of course not, because 36-year-old Megan Fox is the challenger made in Tennessee who underestimates himself, but then ends up winning the match. If only for her training that since she was a child she saw her eating lunches in the bathroom, because at school she was the victim of a bullying which, according to her, was attributable to her dream of having the actress. And if only for her courage that she led her, in 2009, to step into the ring of Jimmy Kimmel Live! and to challenge the extremely sexualizing system of Hollywood with a story that centers on director Michael Bay, a then fifteen-year-old Megan Fox, the impossibility of shooting a scene of Bad Boys II with a minor in a bikini and heels drinking at the bar, and a final solution: “Make me dance under a waterfall while I was getting wet.”

But you know: in 2009 the #MeToo movement is still far away, and what today is seen as a well-placed punch in its time passes as the cute slap of the debut actress of Holiday in the Sun (2001) and How hard it is to be a teenager! (2004); the caress of the super sexy of Transformers (2009) and Jennifer’s Body (2009); the empty tripping of one of the most beautiful women in the world according to the magazines Maxim (2007) and FHM (which places it in first place in 2008 and also in 2009). What is certain is that that same year Megan Fox ends up really going to the mat, but not because of the allegations of sexualization, but because she is fired on the spot by Steven Spielberg (producer of Transformers), which doesn’t let her go and tell the magazine Wonderland (and not only) that Michael Bay “is a Nazi”. That is: one who puts everyone in line and makes the set a nightmare. And she does nothing if Fox also defines her personal trainer in the same way, who makes her do certain training sessions, certain squats; when you associate the name of one of the big shots in Hollywood with Hitler, my dear, you’re out.

At that point, the work is so broken but the marriage to Brian Austin Green is so happy that the ground is ready for the seed of motherhood to sprout. In 2012 the eldest son arrives, that little Noah Shannon who seems to open the way for Megan Fox to be approved by the self-styled “right moms”, who somehow grasp the potential but do not fully celebrate it. At least until the interview that the actress gives in 2019 to Entertainment Tonight in which the outburst towards the “dark” period experienced in Hollywood becomes the definitive proof of how much Megan Fox deserves to be part of the club. “I think it was necessary to get pregnant. That was the first real turning point where my consciousness shifted and my mind opened, and I was able to see from above and breathe and enjoy it ”: roar of approval. “And then [è arrivato] another child, and then another, and with each child I feel as if [quella] had always been the door to a better version of me ”: standing ovation.

And while a year later the mothers belly are still busy transcribing those words on the tables of the commandments of the “right” mother (not any, foolish), Megan Fox calls her personal trainer to prepare for the inevitable clash that (she already knows) awaits you. Announcing the separation from her husband and coming out with Machine Gun Kelly (that Colson Baker met towards the end of 2019 on the set of Midnight in the Switchgrass), in 2020 what was obvious happens will happen; and Megan Fox, an example of an immaculate mother, becomes the opponent to be knocked out. To complicate matters, the fact that Megan does not talk much about her children either on social networks or in the interviews she gives, where the parenthesis comes after everything that revolves around her and Machine Gun Kelly, the couple who in the meantime does not stop to be talked about. You want it because she publicly apologizes to her tailor for that hole she made in the onesie so she can have sex with her future husband; either because the two admit that they drink each other’s blood (but a few drops!); or because last Halloween he (in the role of Tommy Lee) sniffs “cocaine” from her breast (his Pamela), and then she (in a fishnet bodysuit and collar around her neck), put on all fours, takes communion from he (dressed as a priest); either because the transgression, the little bellies are not okay even if it comes to going out to dinner with a miniskirt, let alone get to levels that are, let’s face it, beyond reasonable common sense.

To the point that they seem to have the effect of sweeping away what Megan Fox had said last April to Glamor UK about their children, and which can be summarized in: «I would like to take them on a trip with me» and «it is difficult to be separated from them in this way. They are my DNA “; as in a: “It’s hard not to feel obligated to be with them all the time, or to constantly feel like I’m not doing a good enough job, but I’m also separated from their father. So, I can only have them half the time. […] And somehow it allows me to have moments for myself, where I can live my life, not only always be someone’s mother, and that’s nice, but you always struggle with guilt, a kind of feeling like ” I haven’t done enough “”; to a ‘I can’t control the way people react to my children […]. This is why I don’t really put them on Instagram or social media. I’m so proud of my children. ‘ With only one overall result: to keep the clash with the mummy tummies, counterparts in one of the most enduring and heavy matches ever seen on social media.

Where the indefatigable boxers of “where are your children?” they lose their turn in the ironic “wait, wait: I … do I have children?”, in one of the rare answers of the silent opponent; where the open hand slap of a Megan Fox who shares a photo in which she holds her breasts in a provocative way sees yet another miss of the “OMG! Are you a mom ?! Grow “; where once it goes down because a “get me pregnant, or kill me” is a message that no one (mother or not) to no one else (child or not) should send; and where another one, any one, kills herself in the umpteenth petty accusation against a mother who, according to her, is not.

Well there, right there, in this example of an infinite and seedy show that features as many ordinary people as one like Megan Fox, there is everything we need to know and understand about how things are in the adult world. In other words, that, parents or not, famous or not, it always works like this: that everyone wants to protect their own children and that of others, but then it ends up that no one really thinks about the children anymore.

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About David Martin

David Martin is the lead editor for Spark Chronicles. David has been working as a freelance journalist.

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